Ever wondered what it is that drives super-successful women? Dr Jude MillerBurke does, and she grilled more than 100 female millionaires for herbook, *TheMillionaire Mystique*. Here she reveals the gems she discovered. Takenotes…

*1. They avoid ‘neggy’ people*

The majority of women who became successful quickly cite incrediblysupportive partners. Toxic relationships are rarely left at home—if youhave a partner who criticises you regularly, or a best friend constantlycausing drama—it will erode your self-esteem and impact your working lifetoo. Surround yourself with people who support and really care about you.

*2. They ditch the ‘OMG’ language*

Self-made millionaires avoid dramatic language—words such as ‘never’ or’always’ don’t feature in their vocabulary because, as leaders, they wantpeople to feel calm and trust their abilities. Using dramatic oremotionally-laden language causes anxiety in people around us, so they areless likely to have confidence in us. State the facts and position yourselfas a calming influence.

*3. They argue*

Sixty percent of the women interviewed described themselves as’argumentative’ and others said that they are comfortable arguing a pointto closure. Learning to be assertive is vital for achieving success, but itmeans ditching your hang-ups—worrying if you’ve upset somebody by speakingyour mind is detrimental (that is, provided you remain polite andrespectful, of course). Lose ‘I don’t mind’ from your vocabulary too—take astance. You’ll waste less time.

*4. They keep a distance from colleagues*

While most of the women interviewed are friendly and keen to buildrelationships with colleagues, they all maintain a line between workfriends and non-work friends. None of them get too close to colleagues;they’d never talk about marriage problems or friend dramas at work, forexample. Instead, they manage their emotions (yes, that includes not cryingat work). That’s what people respect—and what ultimately leads topromotions.

*5. They are diary freaks*

Self-made millionaires have a schedule for everything and are incrediblydisciplined about sticking to them. They know at the beginning of each weekwhom they will be with on which night. Ensuring everything from meetings tofree time scheduled means you’re less likely to burn out, and you’ll workas efficiently as you possibly can.

*6. They have a ‘dream team’*

Every single millionaire I’ve met has a team of advisors—from financialexperts to friends—whose opinions they really trust. Remember, there’s noway you can possibly know everything, so speak to people with experience inthe areas you’re unfamiliar with. Don’t be put off by cost—for example, anaccountant doesn’t have to be hugely expensive if you pay hourly, and visitthem once or twice a year, but they can save you a lot of money.

*7. They check their bank balance*

Millionaires never ignore their finances—no matter what the situation. Theyconstantly review their budgets, logging expenses daily so they knowexactly what’s coming in or going out of their account at any given time.In doing so, you’ll be able to see clearly what you can and can’t afford.All of the millionaires avoid ‘princess syndrome’ too (making unrealisticdemands or spending more than they can afford). Instead, they only splashedout on expensive cars or handbags after reaching financial security.

*8. They log off Facebook*

Each millionaire is so committed to getting the job done that they oftenturn up early to work and stay late, and are mindful of time-wasting, sothey don’t take long lunches or use Facebook at their desk. How far can youexpect to go if you’re snooping on your ex on FB?

*9. They get physical*

Every single one of the millionaires has a physical outlet to keepthemselves centred. They range from team sports to meditation and outdooractivities—all of which have been proven to reduce stress. No matter howbusy they are, they do this regularly, sometimes as much as twice a day.

*10. They give themselves a friggin’ break*

Without exception, all the millionaires see failure as part of success; 70percent have experienced career ‘detours’ such as not getting the job theywanted or being made redundant. Don’t expect to have a ‘linear career’—beopen to change. And when you do fail, be compassionate towards yourself.Made a mistake in a meeting? Who cares. Start getting comfortable withfailure.

* The Millionaire Mystique by Dr Jude Miller Burke published by NicholasBrealey Publishing.